A lot of people know that Pedestal was made to contradict Cosmopolitan, but what many people don’t know is why I feel it should be contradicted in the first place. This is a story that I don’t share with a great deal of people, and for once in my life I’m actually sharing it with the world. Before I tell you this story, I’d like for you to open your mind. Personally, this is hard for me to tell and I know for a fact I will tell this story in circles.
Since I was 12 years old, my mother has been in a physically and emotionally abusive relationship. I never had someone in my ear telling me that what was going on was wrong, but somehow, someway I knew that shit wasn’t right. Many times my mom would try to blow off her situation saying that “others had it much worse”, but even then I knew that no one deserved what we were going through. With me witnessing the things I had to witness, such as: him throwing things at her, calling her out of her name, driving drunk with us in the car, not letting us out the house, and isolating us from our family, it’s a miracle that I’m anywhere as well off as I am right now.
I’m not sure I can say I’m glad that I had to grow up in an abusive home, but I know that without it I wouldn’t be who I am today and there wouldn’t be any “Pedestal” to speak of. I know for a fact that I’m much much stronger because of what I went through and what I still go through with my mother and her boyfriend. A lot of people wonder how I’m not in the same situation my mom is in and how I learned that what was going on was wrong, and truth be told I’m not even sure. . I guess you could say I’m “lucky”? I just believe it’s where life was supposed to bring me.
I believe if my mom had a website like Pedestal or a person other than me to tell her that she deserves the world, she wouldn’t be in the situation she is in today. Pedestal is my way of trying to save other women out there since I couldn’t save my mommy. I want you all to know that you are all special in your own unique ways and that you NEVER have to settle! You deserve the entire fucking world, no matter what ANYONE says! You ARE strong enough to do whatever it is you want to do in life. You are capable of achieving your every goal and destiny.
If you or someone you know is dealing with domestic violence, feel free to email me at pedestalbymj@gmail.com and I’ll be here to talk, give you advice, & even help you out of the situation.
You can also visit this site: http://www.ndvh.org/ Which is the National Domestic Violence Hotline
If you are a child and are dealing with domestic abuse in your home call this number 1-800-999-9999. These people really helped me through my toughest times. You can also visit the website http://www.nineline.org/ for online advice.
Feeling “blaah” this morning, like you’re in a rut? This song [Gotta Get Up by Jill Scott] gets me through my mornings like that. Hope it helps you too! Have a great day :)
Skin, a movie based on the life of Sandra Laing, explores the challenges that a black child born to white parents faces in South Africa, during the apartheid. In theaters now!
BEWARE: You don’t have to look far to find someone [including myself] with this crazy flu. So with that being said, I just want to warn everyone and send a few reminders your way so that you won’t be stuck in the house with the killer flu like me.
Wash your hands more frequently. We all know this, yet most of us fail to increase our hand washing during flu season. Why? Because we don’t feel like it’s that major. Well, it is. We touch so many things everyday and everything that we touch everyday has germs. Wash your hands whenever you think it’s necessary. Not just before you eat or after using the bathroom [although, these are VERY important times for hand washing too.]
Get sleep. If you’re like me, you don’t ever get more than 4 hours of sleep a night. This isn’t good. In order to stay healthy you must get at least 8 hours of sleep a night. When you don’t sleep your body starts to shut down. You become more susceptible to the viruses out there and before you know it, BOOM you’re sick!
Drink plenty of water. Drinking water cleans out your system and keeps it working the way it’s supposed to. Be sure to drink at least 8 - 8 oz glasses of water a day.
Exercise. It doesn’t just keep your bones strong, it also helps to keep your immune system strong.
Eat the proper foods. Get your daily doses of your vitamins. Plenty of fruits and vegetables, calcium rich foods, and lots of vitamin C.